How to Handle Toxic Teams

Because not every fire needs a fire extinguisher. Sometimes, it just needs a cup of chai and a little listening. Here are the 3 Practical Shifts Every Manager Should Try First before escalating to HR.

You walk into yet another Monday meeting.
Someone’s camera is off.
Someone else just said, “as I mentioned earlier…” with that tone.
And someone’s on their third passive-aggressive sigh.

Welcome to what many label a “toxic team.”

But before you rush to HR, call a consultant, or start updating your LinkedIn…

Pause.

Because here’s the quiet truth nobody told you in your management training:
Most toxic behavior isn’t about bad people.
It’s about tired systems, untold stories, and unmet expectations.

Wisdom from the Ground

In many cases, what we call “toxicity” is just connection gone stale.
No rituals. No laughter. No feedback loops that feel safe.
People start pulling away, not because they hate each other —
but because they no longer feel seen.

So before you take the big steps, try these three small ones.

1️⃣ Invite Appreciations (Yes, Even the Awkward Ones)

What to do:
At the start of a team meeting, ask:

“Can anyone share something they genuinely appreciate about a teammate this week?”

Why it works:
Gratitude is like WD-40 for team friction.
It doesn’t fix everything, but it loosens up the rust.

What usually happens:
Someone mumbles something about a deadline being met.
Another adds a quiet “thanks” for a favour last week.
Then, slowly — warmth creeps in. Walls soften.
It’s no miracle. But it’s movement.

2️⃣ Talk About the Habits, Not the People

What to do:
Instead of “Why does Ravi always interrupt?”, ask:

“What team habits would help us work better together?”

Why it works:
It shifts the focus from blame to building.
People stop defending themselves and start co-creating shared norms.

Some things you’ll hear:

• “Let’s finish meetings on time.”
• “Can we have one ‘no meetings’ day?”
• “Fewer last-minute escalations.”

Small tweaks. But made together, they stick.

3️⃣ Ask for a Personal Win (Work-Related or Not)

What to do:
During check-in, say:

“Share one thing you’re proud of this week — doesn’t have to be work.”

Why it works:
This reminds everyone they’re more than job titles and Jira tickets.

What you’ll hear:

• “I finally started running again.”
• “Helped my daughter with her science project.”
• “Managed not to lose it in traffic this morning.” 😅

This shift from roles to realness builds trust.
And where trust grows, drama tends to shrink.

Remember This

Not every tough moment needs an escalation.
Sometimes, it just needs a pause.
A shift in tone.
A moment of shared humanity.

Because when people feel seen, heard, and acknowledged —
they show up differently.

And that difference?
It’s where healing begins.

Read the next blog in this series: