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The Effects of Bullying and how to overcome it

September 6, 2024
Mindfulness, Parenting

Imagine planting a seed and watching it begin to grow, only to damage a part of it. The plant’s shape changes forever. I often compare this kind of damage to bullying — a destructive act that can alter someone’s growth and self-perception. Bullying is one of the worst ways to demoralize a person, leaving scars that can last a lifetime.

Why am I writing about bullying on LinkedIn? Because many of us carry unresolved wounds from childhood. These experiences often affect our subconscious mind, and without realizing it, we may express our buried anger or disappointment towards others — our team members, friends, children, or colleagues. You might be bullying someone without even knowing it.

We need to stop bullying.

Let me share two incidents from my own childhood. The first took place when I was in 7th grade, around 1992. I was in a science class, and the teacher asked me a question I didn’t understand. When I couldn’t answer, the teacher shouted at me. I was terrified and embarrassed — I even wet my pants. Most of the class laughed. That moment was so humiliating! I walked out of the class, heading to the restroom to clean myself. The short walk felt like a 20 km marathon. My mind was flooded with thoughts: Should I run away? Should I commit suicide? (I even thought about hanging myself, but I couldn’t reach the fan on the ceiling). My young mind was overwhelmed with stress, and I desperately needed a hug or some comfort, but I couldn’t share this with my parents for fear of what they might think of me.

I honestly don’t remember how I recovered from that situation, but the memory stayed with me.

The second incident happened in my second year of engineering college. I was fooled by a fellow passenger who took Rs. 50 from my pocket after a friendly 3-hour journey. I wasn’t sure if the money was mine or if he had placed it there and performed some trick. When I innocently shared this story with my roommates, most of them laughed and started calling me “Half Engineer.” This nickname stuck, and the bullying hurt me deeply. I withdrew into my shell again. Many people laugh at others behind their backs, not knowing the damage they cause.

Sadly, many of my friends didn’t know how to support a friend in distress. Perhaps they were never taught good habits by their parents, or maybe the influence of movies and media shaped their behavior in negative ways.

So, who can solve this problem?

If you have gone through something similar, or if you suspect your child might be going through it now, take the time to connect with them. Sit down, play, ask about their day, and listen. In our fast-paced world, chasing big ambitions without a happy family creates a deep void.

P.S.: I have found many tools to heal from my painful memories, thanks to my gurus. If you’d like me to share them, please let me know.

My science teacher did not know that I secured state level 3rd rank in my Diploma courses. and All those friends who laughed at me did not know that I created the product company from India for the world!

Love wins! Love is the language !


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